WARNING: BRAIN DAMAGE CAUSES CONSERVATIVISM.

No, no, WAIT! This is not my assesment. This has been clearly stated today on Fox News by a conservative 'Fox News contributor'. I can not help but watch my favourite comedy channel. A shocking news 'controversy' in the US is making headlines. Apparently, a teacher was videotaped screaming at children who would not stand to attention whilst the morning national anthem was played. Tempting though it is, I will refrain myself from commenting on the nationalistic fervour of this degree.
A conservative 'Faux News contributor', ie: a raving lunatic, selected from the available pool of raving lunatics by the criteria of being able not to spittle the lens of the camera whilst spouting the fiery 'balancing'. Rhetoric that any where else on the planet would earn them a label of a 'dangerous fanatic'. This balanced and read gentelman was commenting on the degeneration of discipline in schools. Naturaly, this sorry state of affairs has nothing to do with the fact that Education in the US receives 53 billion whilst (eg) defence 400 billion (ref).

Responding to the token 'liberal' comentator his words were (paraphrasing); 'In my days, the boy (refering to the student) would be beaten about the head and that would be the end of the matter.Frankly if that were to happen more often, perhaps there would be less people like you around.
The right wing remedy for the plague of liberalism encroching on the god given right to enslave those less fortunate than yourself is blows to the head.

By redirecting just a small proportion of the education budget to the purchase of adjustment clubs, we will expunge this plague of liberalism from our society. A regular clubbing sessions at preschool level would contain this dangerous trend of unchecked free-thinking. It is so simple when voices in your head tell you the solution!

I know, it does sound hard to believe. What is harder to believe that this lunatic was a returning guest. Treated with respect by the other comentators. Truly, as Murdoch has said, there needs to be balance to the 'liberal' media.

Philosophical point. If one side of the argument, presents facts, does that mean that to balance the fact, one must respond with a fiction?
For to balance to affect a force designed to cause equilibrium.

I for one, welcome our new conservative overlords, having received the pre-requisite amount of blows to the head in my youth.

PUBLIC SERVANTS ATE THE POETS.

Yes my friends, there is a plot. As insidious as the pod people, the first wave and The War of the worlds combined. Seekrit public servant deathsquads are hunting down the poets in South Australia and while they sleep in their wine induced stupor are murdered in cold blood. Worse yet, some turn into soul-less zombies.

What leads me to make this public asertion, denouncement and disclosure, though it might cost me my life? Aye, a fair question. Last night I have gone to see a local amateur poets reading mob. It was the inducement of cheap wine and whine I guess. Nay, it was the company of T. Or maybe it was the desire to be exposed to something Kulduhral again. Fact is, me senses are reeling. Nay, not from the breath taking beauty of the poetry, but from the... um... err...sheer...urr... officious amateurinesnesnesnes of it all. I have attended corporate meetings that were more relaxed and fun that this sad occasion. More akin to what I imagine a large, self help group like AA or 'Victims of under-the-furniture fluff' sans the medication.

Maybe that is what was missing. Heavy medication. The wine certainly not sufficient to dull the pain. You think I am exaggerating? I got a cramp in the upper right side of my body as if I was doing a Houdini trick.

Still, it WAS fun and I shall allow myself to be inflicted by this mob again.
The exceptions to this miserable time were a couple of poets, a published guest Mr.S whose formal and byzantine verbosities struck a note with me so much so I have purchased his dead-tree edition of scribblings. T's friend J., whose poem 'I hate rock chix' was delivered with passion and humor which was a commodity sorely lacking in this morbid gathering.

The good thing is, I was inspired to write this;

On a matt with Pia

Hush, whisper, murmur, brush.
Peck, caress, smooch, touch.
Slide, shift, pop, zip.
Unclasp, peel, strip, unclip

Smack, mush, peck, smooch
Giggle, gag, nip, ouch!
Shudder, flutter, toss, stamp
Wobble, bump, contortion, cramp

Tremor, rumble, shake, vibrate
Oscillate, undulate, vacillate, palpitate
Sigh, groan, moan, gasp
Roar, Howl, Boom, Blast!

THUNDER, SMASH, EXPLODE... Crash!

Applause!

By Wulfius Khan, Adelaide March 2004,
Copyright violators will be carpet-bombed into stone age.